


Marker

by BLUEOCEAN13



Category: We Bare Bears (TV)
Genre: Denial of Feelings, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Sexuality Crisis, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:33:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25213966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BLUEOCEAN13/pseuds/BLUEOCEAN13
Summary: Hope you like! I'm not the best writer in the world so be warned.
Relationships: Charlie/Panda (We Bare Bears)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	Marker

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like! I'm not the best writer in the world so be warned.

Panda was  _ crying.  _

  
  


As he raced for his bedroom and slammed the door, he tried to figure what was the cause for his sudden tears. 

  
  


Oh. 

  
  


Now he remembered. 

  
  


Panda sat on the edge of his bed with wet trails soaking the fur on his face. He was crying because he remembered that he was lonely. 

  
  


He knew he had his brothers who loved and cared about him. Ones who were always there for him. But it still wasn't enough.

  
  


God why wasn't it enough?! 

  
  


He wanted someone to call  _ his _ own. 

  
  


Someone who he could hug under the comfort of his blanket with. 

  
  


Someone who he could share a milkshake with on hot summer days. 

  
  


Someone who would hold his paw down the street as they laughed about a joke that only made sense between them. 

  
  


It was what Panda wanted so much. 

  
  


_ But.  _

  
  


He just can't seem to get a girlfriend. 

  
  


Why can't he get a girlfriend? What was wrong with him? Why is it the only ones that have an interest in him either move away or have someone already? 

  
  


Or even go so far to cheat him out of a relationship? It wasn't  _ fair  _ to Panda at all. 

  
  


A sudden knock on the door made the black and white bear jump in place. His heart skips a beat when he realizes it's Grizz. 

  
  


"Panpan?" Grizz spoke from the other side of the door. "You alright little bro?" 

  
  


"I'm fine!" Panda shouted. "Just leave  _ me _ alone!" 

  
  


"Come on. You can talk to me man." Grizz pleaded. His tone sounded worried. 

  
  


Panda didn't want anyone to be worried about him. It wasn't  _ necessary! _

  
  


"No! I said  _ go away _ !" He snapped. 

  
  


Can he be left alone for just one minute!?

  
  


Annoyance swamped him as Grizz replied. "Okay Panpan. We're here for you through! Just want you to know that."

  
  


Panda wrapped his blanket around himself and didn't bother uttering out an answer to his older brother.

  
  
  


*

  
  
  


Grizz turned to face Ice Bear with a crestfallen expression. "Guess we should listen, lil bro.." He unwillingly dragged his feet away from Panda's bedroom door. "Maybe Charlie can try to talk to him when he gets here."

  
  


"Ice Bear believes in Charlie." Ice Bear places a paw on his own chest and closes his eyes for a moment. "Charlie is filled with light and love." 

  
  


"Did I hear my name?" Charlie came walking out of the kitchen. "I hope ya bears don't mind me letting myself in from your back door." 

  
  


"Nah that's cool." Grizz shrugged. "You're kinda early though. Lil bro hasn't started dinner yet." 

  
  


"Oh whoops." Charlie grinned uneasily. "My bad. I just got the feeling that I should've come sooner. So here I am!" The Bigfoot looked around the cave. "By the way, where's my Panda?" 

  
  


Grizz rubbed the fur on the back of his neck. "He's locked in his room." He sighed. "He's been crying more than usual." 

  
  


Maybe Charlie helping out wouldn't be the best  _ idea.  _ He knew Panda and it was best to give his younger brother space for a little while. "I think we should let him have some breathing room, man. It's been tough for him." 

  
  


"Ice Bear has never seen Panda in such despair. Ice Bear is concerned." Ice Bear brushed past Charlie so he could start making dinner. "But Ice Bear agrees big brother should have time to meditate." 

  
  


Grizz and Charlie stared in silence after Ice Bear before facing back to each other. 

  
  


"So maybe just? Stay out here, Charlie?" The grizzly bear requested. 

  
  


The bigfoot's expression faltered for a moment. Then in an instant returned to its former glory. 

  
  


Charlie got a bright smile and a friendly twinkle in his dark blue eyes. "Panda shouldn't be alone if he's feeling bad!" The bigfoot whisked past Grizz. 

  
  


"But Charlie-" 

  
  


"Don't you worry none!" Charlie cut Grizz off. "I'll get him feeling right as rain in a jiffy!" 

  
  


Grizz closed his mouth. 

  
  


He hoped it would turn out for the better since Charlie was so insistent to help Panda feel better. Even though he didn't think it was a good idea. But who was he to try and stop Charlie? 

  
  


So just what could go wrong?

  
  
  
  


*

  
  
  
  


Panda was still on the edge of his bed with paws tightly grasped together. His tears were beginning to subside as he got over his breakdown. A breakdown that seemed more intense then usual. 

  
  


Why was he such a crybaby? 

  
  


He almost. 

  
  


_ Almost.  _

  
  


Hated himself for it. 

  
  


This was too hard for him to deal with on his own. He didn't want to burden anymore with his issues though. He could barely cope with them by himself so how would it be any easier for anyone else?

  
  


Another sudden knock on the door nearly sent Panda toppling to the floor. 

  
  


What did his bros want  _ now?  _

  
  


Didn't he tell them to leave him  _ alone?  _

  
  


"Panman?" Panda froze at the sound of Charlie's voice. "Ya in there?" 

  
  


Feeling overwhelmingly anxious, the bear doesn't reply. He remains quiet and tries to keep still. Maybe if he doesn't make a noise, Charlie will go away. 

  
  


It didn't work. It never works. 

  
  


Charlie knocked gently on the wooden door three times. "Come on Panda. I know you're in there. I wanna talk to my favorite bear!" 

  
  


Panda sniffled. How could he be anyone's favorite bear? 

  
  


He was a  _ mess.  _ A mess he didn't want anyone seeing right now. 

  
  


"No! Just go away, Charlie!" Panda cried out. "I want to be left alone!" 

  
  


He sounded far more miserable than he intended to be. He was sure his voice cracked as well. But it didn't matter. 

  
  


No one could see him. 

  
  


No one could look at him and judge him and call him names for being a total crybaby. 

  
  


"....Panda." Charlie's voice dropped to a much quieter tone. "Buddy. Ya seem upset. I just wanna help you through whatever's on your mind. Can ya let your pal Charlie in? I ain't gonna judge ya!" 

  
  


Panda stared at his clenched paws. Then at the door that was a barrier between him and Charlie. 

  
  


What would happen if he unlocked the door and let Charlie in?

He didn't know. There was no way of knowing unless he did. 

  
  


"Panda?" His friend wiggled the doorknob. 

  
  


Inhaling, Panda hopped off his mattress. As softly as possible, he moved across the room to the door. Slowly, he lifted up his paw to the knob and _ … _

  
  


_ Click.  _

  
  


The door was unlocked. 

  
  


He quickly retreated back to his bed and yanked the purple blanket over his head. He trembled slightly, fearing what might come out of this. 

  
  
  


*

  
  
  


Charlie heard the lock click and Panda steps as he fled from the door. 

  
  


Hesitantly, he places his hand back on the knob. He didn't know what to expect as he pushed the door open. 

  
  


The bedroom was comfortably dark. 

  
  


A couple plushies were scattered about on the floor and a few crumpled up papers. 

  
  


The Bigfoot could detect a purple shape atop the bed right in front of him. He got the feeling that someone was standing behind him and he slowly turned his head to see Grizz there. 

  
  


"You actually got him to open the door, man." The grizzly bear was in obvious surprise as he muttered to the taller guy. 

  
  


"It wasn't hard!" Charlie muttered in return. "I think it'll be best if ya stay out here though. Don't wanna overwhelm Panpan."

  
  


Grizz nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Good luck dude." 

  
  


"Thank ya." Charlie entered the shadowed room with the only light being sunlight. Though that was soon to change since night was beginning to fall. 

  
  


He closed the door behind him as silently as possible and approached the lump that was occupying Panda's bed. 

  
  


Charlie eased himself down on the edge of the mattress, looking at what he thought had to be Panda. What else could it be other than his best buddy? 

  
  


He decided to wait until the bear was ready to come out. He didn't want to pressure Panda. 

  
  


The sun was fading fast as the minutes passed. The light from the window disappeared and caused the room to become even darker. Wasn't there a lamp in here? 

  
  


It didn't matter really.

  
  


Charlie could see just fine. He was more concerned with the fact it would be Panda who can't see in the dark. 

  
  


And speak of the devil, there was Panda poking his head out from under the blanket. 

  
  


Their eyes immediately met and Charlie couldn't help but toss a sweet smile in his bear friend's direction.

  
  


Panda says nothing as he sits up and leans his back against the headboard of his bed. He kicks the blanket away from him. He brings his knees to his chest and wraps his forepaws around his legs.

  
  


Charlie shifts, unsure how to begin exactly. "Grizz told me you've been crying a whole bunch recently." 

  
  


Panda glimpsed away towards his window. Fireflies were dancing among the tree branches and the bushes. "Yeah." He said quietly. 

  
  


Charlie edged closer to the black and white bear then stopped. He didn't want to get too close in case Panda wasn't fancying close contact right now. "Do ya know why, panpan?" 

  
  


Panda shook his head. "I  _ don't.  _ And that's the whole problem." The bear sighed very heavily. "I thought it was because of a girl. But I'm just. I'm just not sure anymore." 

  
  


Charlie blinked. 

  
  


Panda continued to go on. "I've been confused lately, man. I feel like I'm  _ missing  _ something." His breath hitched. "But I can't figure it out!" 

  
  


Charlie holds the side of his own face. "I've been confused too. A whole lot! I once went into a cave and when I came back out, all my dinosaur buds were gone!" He chuckled a little. "I assumed they went somewhere else like another planet. I don't get either why humans wanna get my picture so darn bad. Or why squirrels use their little teeth to open acorns when they just could borrow a canopener!" 

  
  


Panda sighed. "Sorry Charlie but that isn't really helpful."

  
  


Charlie  _ hmms.  _ There's gotta be something he can do to help his panpan.

  
  


Oh! Hugging! The one thing he was good at?

  
  


How could he forget?

  
  


"This will help ya!" Charlie beamed and wrapped up Panda in a tight hug. 

  
  
  


*

  
  
  


Panda inhaled in response as Charlie hugged him. He wasn't exactly sure how to feel about Charlie's embraces anymore. He liked them...but didn't like them at the same time. 

  
  


That was seriously conflicting. 

  
  


"It's gonna be alright pumpkin." Charlie assured as he ended the hug. "You got lil ole me around to help out. Your brothers got ya back too. There's time to figure whatever's nagging at ya." 

  
  


"...Thank you Charlie.." Panda mutters. 

  
  


"Anything for you buddy." It got  _ really _ quiet after that. 

  
  


Panda was the first to break the silence. He wasn't exactly eager to face his brothers. Especially after practically breaking down in front of them. "I don't want to leave my room yet…" 

  
  


"Ah you don't have to Panda. We can just stay in here however long you want!" 

  
  


That sounded like a nice idea. 

  
  


"...or we could sneak out and head off to my beautiful pad instead…?" Charlie offered.

  
  


Panda thought.  _ Maybe  _ it would be nice to get away from the cave. At least for a little while. "O-Okay." 

  
  


Charlie's eyes sparkled as he stood up. "Really?" The bigfoot went for the only window in Panda's room which was right by his bed. "Aw! Let's go then!" He lifted up the glass panel effortlessly. 

  
  


"Uh Charlie?" Panda rubbed his face. "I'm not going to fit through there." 

  
  


"We can at least try!" His friend squeezed through the gap and into the outside without hardly an issue. "Come on pal! I'll help ya!" 

  
  


Panda intaked a breath. "Ugh I can't believe I'm doing this.." He scooted closer to where the window was. 

  
  


"Hmm. Maybe if ya go head last?" Charlie cupped his chin. 

  
  


"Charlie that's not gonna work!" Panda huffed. "I'm going  _ headfirst."  _ He stood up on the mattress and gripped the window sill. He poked his head outside, flinching at the breeze blowing in his face. 

  
  


"Alrighty then. I'll be right here if ya have any struggles." Charlie backed up a little to give Panda some space. 

  
  


The black and white bear got about halfway through the window before his thick as heck fur got in the way. He began to panic, trying to fight the rest of the way out. 

  
  


It was to no avail.

  
  


"Ugh Charlie! I told  _ you _ this was a dumb idea!" 

  
  


"Panman, stay still!" Charlie grabbed both his forepaws. "I'm gonna get ya out!" The bigfoot pulled  _ hard. _ Panda was sure he heard a crack in his left arm. "Man stop!" 

  
  


Charlie let go. 

  
  


"This is my fate now." Panda sulked, letting his forepaws hang uselessly. "Stuck in a dang window because I'm too much of a coward to face my brothers!" 

  
  


"That ain't true Panda!" Charlie got a determined look. "I'll get ya outta here. I'll find a way!" The bigfoot dashed off, disappearing from Panda's sight.

  
  


Great. 

  
  


Now he was stuck in a window  _ and  _ alone at the edge of some really creepy shadow woods. He gulped when he heard a crunch and silently hoped it was just a bunny or something small and totally not life threatening in any way. 

  
  


Nothing came to show itself, which was a major relief. 

  
  


"Panda!" The sound of Charlie returning somewhat eased the bear's anxiety. 

  
  


"Man what took you so long?!" Panda barked.

  
  


"I was only gone five minutes, pumpkin." Charlie walked over to where Panda was still stuck. He was holding some sort of long skinny object. 

  
  


It was a  _ stick.  _

  
  


"Seriously?! A stick?!" Panda sucked in a bunch of air. "How is that going to get me out, man?" 

  
  


"What? It's worked before!" 

  
  


"With what? A  _ snake?"  _

  
  


"No! A raccoon!" Charlie poked the stick in between the wall of the window and Panda's fur. 

  
  


He got  _ stabbed  _ right in the side. "Okay Charlie please stop doing that. It freaking  _ hurts."  _ He let out a growl.

  
  


Charlie discarded the stick by tossing it to the side. "Ah well um." The taller guy looked around. "I could try tugging ya out again?" 

  
  


Panda held out his forepaws in a quiet  _ yes _ . It was the only option they had. Charlie grabbed his paws and gently pulled. 

  
  


He barely budged. 

  
  


"Come on man!" Panda groaned in annoyance. "I'm not going to get out of here if you treat me like some delicate flower!" 

  
  


"But ya are a delicate flower, panpan." Charlie smiled. 

  
  


Warmth blazed Panda's cheeks. "Whatever! JUST GET ME FREE!" 

  
  


"Alright. Alright." Charlie pulled with all his might and suddenly, Panda was loose. But not exactly. 

  
  


He was free from the wall but...not from the window. Part of the cave was taken with him and the sill of the window was still around his waist. 

  
  


Shoot!

  
  


"Oh yikes Panda!" Charlie helped him stand up. "I got it!" The window frame was tugged off over his head by the bigfoot, one of the corners snapping as he did. 

  
  


Charlie replaced the broken window in the now large hole in the wall of Panda's room. 

  
  


_ Ugh. _

  
  


It'll have to be fixed correctly later. At least Panda wasn't trapped anymore. 

  
  


"Let's be on our way buddy." Charlie waltzed into the trees while whistling a cheery tune. Obviously not waiting to see if Panda was  _ actually  _ following.

  
  


Panda gave one last look at the dimly lit cave before following Charlie into the dark woods. He brushed cave residue out of his fur, grumbling that he was going to have to take a long shower later. 

  
  


"I've spruced up my home some. There's a couple things I wanna show ya." 

  
  


"Can't  _ wait _ ." Panda focused on the ground as he walked, being careful to not step on potentially dangerous shapes or bumps. He glanced up every few moments to make sure that Charlie was still in his sights. 

  
  


He would rather not lose his friend and get lost in the woods while it was nighttime. That would make everything so much worse. 

  
  


They tumbled down a slight incline and they finally arrived in the clearing where Charlie lived. It looked the same as it always did so not much has been added to it. Or because it was too dark to even notice any differences. 

  
  


"Tabes gave me a suncatcher to hang up in my house. Come and see pumpkin cake!" Charlie opened the front door of the car home and pointed to the suncatcher dangling from the rearview mirror. 

  
  


It was a snake. 

  
  


"That's nice man." Panda wasn't really interested but he peeked anyways at the snake suncatcher. 

  
  


At least it wasn't a real  _ snake _ . 

  
  


"Oh! Oh! And look at this!" The bigfoot tugged Panda by his paw to a hoola hoop lying on the ground. "I found it on a playground just abandoned! I ain't sure what it's for but the sparkles in it are really pretty." 

  
  


"That's a hoola hoop, Charlie." 

  
  


"A hoola what now?" 

  
  


"It's for...ugh...just let me show you." Panda picked up the hoop and held it around his waist with both forepaws. He's never actually done this before. He hoped he didn't end up making a complete fool of himself. 

  
  


But eh. It was Charlie. He wasn't the type to laugh at someone in ill intent. 

  
  


Panda released the hoop and moved his hips. It worked for a second but it ended up falling to the grass, whacking him in the ankle. 

  
  


He kicked it away in frustration. So much for that. 

  
  


"Oh!" Charlie grabbed the hoola hoop and did the same as Panda demonstrated. "I get it now! Like this panman?" He spun the toy around his waist like it was nothing. And for several minutes. 

  
  


How did he…?! 

  
  


"Yeah Charlie….that's how you do it…" 

  
  


Charlie let the hoop fall and he stepped out of the circle. "I got one more thing to show ya."

  
  


Panda sighed. He hoped it was quick. He was starting to get tired. 

  
  


The bigfoot reached under the car and took out some sort of marker. "I found this here thing too! It's a drawing thingy. I figured out that it can be used on glass." Charlie took off the pink cap and wrote something. 

  
  


Curious, Panda leaned in to see just what his friend was writing. 

  
  


_ Panda and Charlie BFFs forever ♡  _

  
  


Panda chuckled at that, feeling fuzzy inside. He reached for the marker. "Can I write something too, man?" 

  
  


"Of course!" Charlie handed the marker to the bear gleefully. Their hands grazed briefly and caused Panda to retract his paw swiftly, blood rushing to his face. "Anything ya like!" 

  
  


A blush tints Panda's cheeks as he scribbles into the window under Charlie's surprisingly neat handwriting. 

  
  


_ Panda was here.  _

  
  


It was a classic and Panda couldn't resist. He gave the marker back to Charlie.

  
  


_ PS Charlie was here too! _

  
  


The pair took turns with the marker, doodling and writing random stuff until there was only one spot left on the windshield.

  
  


Panda gets an idea of what could go there. 

"Hey Charlie." He swallowed nervously. "L-Let's draw each other here…" 

  
  


"That's a great idea panpan!" Charlie's blue eyes twinkle. Like stars on a clear blue winter night. "You draw me first." 

  
  


Panda did just that. 

  
  


He took his time to doodle Charlie on the window, being sure to add extra sparkles to his best friend's eyes to resemble the stars. He added some blush ovals as well onto doodle Charlie's cheeks. The pink made it look like he was blushing.

  
  


That was Panda's goal. 

  
  


Charlie gets the marker back and begins to draw Panda next to the art of him. His hand isn't as steady when it comes to art and most of the lines were crooked or have gaps. 

  
  


Still it turned out pretty nice. 

  
  


"Done!" Charlie pulled back with the marker still in hand.

  
  


In the drawing, their hands were holding. For some reason that made Panda grow warm in the cheeks. He has fantasized about holding Charlie's hand before. 

  
  


Multiple times actually. 

  
  


Panda takes the marker from Charlie once more and he doodles a pink heart above them, coloring it in. He closes the marker with the pink lid and sets it down. 

  
  


"Ahh panpan. It's so beautiful." Charlie admired the work they had done with a happy smile and that same star filled blue gaze. 

  
  


"It really is." Panda smiled slightly as well. 

  
  


"Welp." Charlie suddenly raised up his arms. "You're missing dinner. I better walk ya home, Panda." 

  
  


Panda's heart dropped. He...He didn't want to go home. At least not yet. He hesitated to follow Charlie who was already making way from his house. 

  
  


"Something wrong pumpkin?" Charlie returned to his side and gently patted him on the head. 

  
  


"Can...Can I s-stay here…?" Panda stuttered. "I...I really don't want to go back to the cave yet….man…." 

  
  


"Ah. That's sure fine sweetie!" Charlie beamed. "You can even spend the night if ya want. I like having you around a whole bunch."

  
  


"If that's o-okay…" 

  
  


"Of course it's okay!" The bigfoot opened the back door of his house and motioned for Panda to go in. "We can hang out inside here for a bit before we sleep. Do you want me to find some berries for ya?" 

  
  


"I...alright." The bear climbed into the car, scooting over so there was room for Charlie. "No I'm fine." He wasn't that hungry anyways. 

  
  


"Okay!" The taller guy got in after Panda. He closed the door back as carefully as possible.

  
  


It gets awkwardly quiet at that point. 

  
  


Panda didn't have a clue just what they could talk about. To be honest he  _ never  _ did. 

  
  


"Remember the last time we were in here together?" Charlie asked, obviously trying to start up a conversation. 

  
  


That was when the hurricane happened wasn't it? 

  
  


Oh. 

  
  


That was a day Panda rather not be reminded of. 

  
  


"Um yeah." He shuddered. "That was not fun." 

  
  


"Yeah it really wasn't." Charlie agreed. "Thought you were gonna die that day but sure glad my snake buddy was there to save the day." 

  
  


Charlie thought he was going to die?

  
  


Well Panda thought he was going to, too. But he didn't. And he had to thank some random snake for that. 

  
  


Gosh that was weird. 

  
  


A snake saving his life. 

  
  


That was something Panda never would've expected to happen.

  
  


"Well I ended up fine." He said. "For once." 

  
  


"Yeah." Charlie shuffled in place. Was he nervous about something? Why would he be nervous? "I liked that day though. I got to hang out with my best bud and all my forest pals at the same time."

  
  


Panda couldn't really agree. It was an unpleasant experience to himself. Yet he didn't say because he didn't want to possibly make Charlie feel bad. He's done that enough to his friend already in the time they've known each other.

  
  


It goes back to uncomfortably quiet again. 

  
  


Charlie scoots close to Panda while whistling innocently. Their fur is  _ almost  _ touching.

  
  


"What are you d-doing…?" Panda questions. 

  
  


Charlie's face flushes. "I'm a bit cold but I'm alright!" He looked away and began staring outside the window. 

  
  


Panda's face tightened a little. He was a little cold too. But he stays where he is, anxiety preventing him from getting closer to Charlie. 

  
  


He wished he wasn't such a chicken. 

  
  


Suddenly Panda feels gentle arms wrap around him and he's pulled to the left side of the car. He turns his head to see Charlie smiling while still staring out the back window. The bear sighed softly and he slowly pressed into his friend. 

  
  


Charlie rests his cheek atop Panda's head. 

  
  


Panda shuts his eyes. He can smell the bigfoot's earthy scent being this close. 

  
  


It was strangely comforting. 

  
  


Panda isn't sure how much time has passed before Charlie's hand moves to hold the panda bear's face. He opens his green eyes back up to stare into those dark blue ones. They were filled with light and love...and happiness. 

  
  


Panda couldn't believe that anyone would ever look at him in that way but Charlie here was. 

  
  


Looking at  _ him in that way.  _

  
  


He reaches up to hold the hand that's cupping his cheek, blush developing on his face as he did.

  
  


"Panda..?" Charlie whispers. It sounded like sweet music in Panda's ears. 

  
  


"Y-Yeah…?" Panda stutters with his voice just as quiet as Charlie's. 

  
  


"I...I love ya…." A blue blush spreads across Charlie's cheeks. "...a whole lot." 

  
  


Panda's heart leaped. Feeling suddenly brave, he pressed his mouth against Charlie's. He didn't know where it came from. 

  
  


Or why. 

  
  


Just that he really  _ wanted  _ to kiss Charlie. 

  
  


Charlie kissed back while shutting his eyes at the same time so Panda knew it was something they both wanted. The delicate kiss lasted for a few moments.

A few short sweet moments. 

  
  


The pair moved away from each other with gazes locked. 

  
  


Their faces were tinted with blush. 

  
  


Crimson red and navy blue. 

  
  


Right then and there, Panda began to panic. The realization of what just happened between them dawned on him. 

  
  


He scurried away from Charlie, leaning on the car handle and falling out onto the grass and into brush.

  
  
  


*

  
  
  


Charlie was confused and feeling hurt as Panda fled from him. 

  
  


What did he do wrong? 

  
  


Panda had initiated the kiss so wasn't that something he wanted with him? But why was the bear crawling backwards from the car? 

  
  


Charlie climbs out of his home and stands up. 

  
  


Panda is leaning against a tree trunk with his chest rapidly moving as he was breathing quick. 

  
  


Was he having one of those asthma attacks?

  
  


Was that what it was called? 

  
  


Charlie sure hoped not. He didn't think Panda had his breath reliever thing on him. Though he would gladly run to the cave if that was what was going on. 

  
  


The bigfoot stepped closer to his best friend. It was clear to see Panda was in fact crying. The tears spilled down his face and dampened the black and white fur under his eyes. 

  
  


"Panpan?" Charlie croaked. Okay maybe it wasn't an asthma attack. 

  
  


But this was his fault wasn't it?

  
  


If he hadn't hugged Panda so close then maybe his favorite bear wouldn't be crying right now…the kiss would've never  _ happened. _ "A-Are you alright?"

  
  


He was unsure whether or not to comfort Panda. Before it never came as a second thought but now….it felt different. 

  
  


It was knowing he could be the cause of Panda's misery that kept him in one place.

"Ugh! I shouldn't be feeling this way, man!" Panda shouts. "I  _ like  _ girls. I  _ want  _ to be with a girl. If I don't, then people will think I'm all too feminine cuz I'm dating a freaking guy!!!" 

  
  


Charlie's heart ached. Not just for the situation but for Panda too. He didn't completely understand being trans but he knows enough it can be a tough experience to cope with. Especially when others still perceive you as someone who is no longer you.

  
  


It's one of the most painful things in the world being called someone you're not. 

  
  


The bigfoot sits down a couple feet away from Panda. He brings his knees to his chest. "Panda….you're one of those very manly men I know! Who cares what all them other folks think. Ya can be with whoever you want!" 

  
  


"I can't  _ not  _ just care what other people think, Charlie." Panda sniffled loudly. "Just leave me alone man…" 

  
  


"No can do panman." Charlie scooted closer to his bear friend. "There ain't nothing wrong with a guy dating a guy. Or a gal dating a gal." 

  
  


Charlie knew himself that he was a guy who was only into guys romantically. He never saw the appeal in gals. He never even knew the proper word for his preference until he met the bears. 

  
  


"I  _ know  _ there's nothing wrong with  _ it."  _ Panda huffed. "The problem is I can't  _ accept  _ that's who I  _ am."  _

  
  


Charlie frowned. 

  
  


His words weren't helping much. What did he have to do to help Panda feel better? "No one's rushing ya to accept it pan _ man.  _ Ya got a whole lotta time to figure it out!" 

  
  


Panda said nothing. He instead buried his tear stricken face into his knees. 

  
  


Charlie gets even closer to his pal until they're side by side to each other. Panda doesn't budge though the bigfoot can feel the bear loosen up some. "I gotta question for ya." 

  
  


" _ What?"  _ Panda's voice is muffled. He shuffles a little bit to peek up at Charlie. 

  
  


"How bout our kiss? Did you like it?" He asked. He wanted to know and maybe it'll help out Panda in the long run. Make things more clear for him. 

  
  


That face went hidden away once again. "Y-Yeah…" The response came out a whimper and all muffled. "I d-did…" 

  
  


Charlie didn't know how to take in that information. Panda  _ did  _ enjoy their first kiss. It made him feel all giddy and fuzzy inside. Knowing his friend liked him back warmed him up from head to toe.

  
  


"Then don't let your fears stop ya Panda!" Charlie piped. "You deserve to be a happy bear!!! Don't ya think that too?" 

  
  


Panda looked at Charlie again. The tears had stopped pouring out of those beautiful forest green eyes. "I g-guess…." He wiped a paw over his nose. 

  
  


"No pumpkin!" Charlie urges. "I don't wanna hear no I guess! You  _ know! _ " 

  
  


Panda inhales and exhales. " _ Fine. I know."  _

  
  


"That's what I wanna hear!" Charlie smiled softly. "I'll be here for ya Panda. You can always count on your best friend Charlie to get ya out of a pickle." 

  
  


Panda twiddled his paws. Unexpectedly he got closer to the bigfoot, still staring away from him. "T-Thank you...man…for talking…." 

  
  


Charlie pecked the black and white bear on the ear. "Anything for my Panda bear!" 

  
  


Panda chuckled softly. 

  
  


Charlie did the same, his heart beating faster in his chest. He loved this  _ bear  _ so much oh my gosh. He wondered if Panda felt the same way about him. 

  
  


"I'm getting kinda tired, man..." Panda yawned big. Exhaustion was clear in his eyes. It would be a surprise if he wasn't tired after all that crying and walking around and getting stuck in a window. 

  
  


"Here. Lemme carry ya." Charlie hoisted himself to his feet. 

  
  


"I can walk Charlie." Panda insisted as he stood up too. He ran his paws over his fur to clear off any grass that might have gotten stuck on him. 

  
  


The bigfoot picked off a leaf that was snagged on Panda's head and dropped it. It spiraled to the ground. "Aw come on. Ya had a long night pumpkin! It's the least I can do for ya." 

  
  


Panda rolled his eyes. "Fine." He lifted up his paws. 

  
  


Charlie beamed as he picked up the sleepy bear and cradled him in his arms. It was a really short walk back to his house but he wanted to hold his panda every chance he got. Even if it was only for a few feet. 

  
  


Panda tucked his face in Charlie's shoulder and clutched to the bigfoot tightly. 

  
  


Charlie opened the door with his foot and slid into the back seat. "It's mighty tight in here. It looks like we're gonna have to cuddle sweetie if we wanna be comfortable."

  
  


"You're not subtle, you know that?" Panda growled and stood on the floor of the car. " _ Fine.  _ Only because there's no dang room."

  
  


Charlie grinned as he settled onto his back, holding out his long arms. "Get on over here so I can hug ya."

  
  


Panda hesitated. He slowly eased his cheek down on Charlie's chest. The bear was immediately wrapped in a gentle hug and pecked on the head. 

  
  


"Goodnight my sweet Panda…" Charlie whispered. One of those hands stroked his back in soft circles. 

  
  


"G-Goodnight Charlie…." 

  
  


Panda closed his eyes. He felt comfortable enough to drift off in his friend's arms. 

  
  


It would turn out to be the peaceful sleep he would've ever gotten in his life. 

**Author's Note:**

> Grizz: *entering Panda's room* 
> 
> Where did they go?
> 
> Ice Bear: Ice Bear gets extra dinner tonight.


End file.
